The Race

I’m going to share with you a poem that has changed my life dramatically. My Father, Dave Severn,  read this poem to me. I recite these words to myself almost every day. “Get up, and finish the race!”

We all have tough days. We all face disappointment. We all have those days where we look to the sky and yell out, “Why God?!”

But we have to put our best foot forward and keep pushing into the future. We have to try. TRY. TRY AGAIN!!!!!

There is nothing in the bible that says, “This is going to be easy” 

Life is so hard some days I don’t even know how to pull through to the next. But I do. The days that are the hardest, often end with you being the proudest.

You say to yourself, “if I can make it through that, I can make it through anything.”

My daughter turned eleven months old yesterday. I thought back to the first day of her diagnosis. I remember feeling, HOPELESS. Well, here I am eleven months later, still standing, making changes to my life, and  pushing every day to build a great future for our daughter. 

So here it is, the poem that changed my life, and I hope and pray it will help you get through those tough days. 


Whenever I start to hang my head in front of failure’s face,
my downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.
A children’s race, young boys, young men; how I remember well,
excitement sure, but also fear, it wasn’t hard to tell.
They all lined up so full of hope, each thought to win that race
or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
Their parents watched from off the side, each cheering for their son,
and each boy hoped to show his folks that he would be the one.

The whistle blew and off they flew, like chariots of fire,
to win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
One boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd,
was running in the lead and thought “My dad will be so proud.”
But as he speeded down the field and crossed a shallow dip,
the little boy who thought he’d win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch himself, his arms flew everyplace,
and midst the laughter of the crowd he fell flat on his face.
As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn’t win it now.
Humiliated, he just wished to disappear somehow.

But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”
He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a bit that’s all,
and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win,
his mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.
He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace.
“I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.”

But through the laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face
with a steady look that said again, “Get up and win that race!”
So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind the last.
“If I’m to gain those yards,” he thought, “I’ve got to run real fast!”
Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight, then ten…
but trying hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.
Defeat! He lay there silently. A tear dropped from his eye.
“There’s no sense running anymore! Three strikes I’m out! Why try?
I’ve lost, so what’s the use?” he thought. “I’ll live with my disgrace.”
But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.

“Get up,” an echo sounded low, “you haven’t lost at all,
for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
Get up!” the echo urged him on, “Get up and take your place!
You were not meant for failure here! Get up and win that race!”
So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to forfeit,
and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.
So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been,
still he gave it all he had and ran like he could win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he rose again.
Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered another boy who crossed the line and won first place,
head high and proud and happy — no falling, no disgrace.
But, when the fallen youngster crossed the line, in last place,
the crowd gave him a greater cheer for finishing the race.
And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud,
you would have thought he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”
“To me, you won,” his father said. “You rose each time you fell.”

And now when things seem dark and bleak and difficult to face,
the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
And when depression and despair shout loudly in my face,
another voice within me says, “Get up and win that race!”

-Dr. D.H. “Dee” Groberg


What if you fly?

When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? 

When I was in the first grade we were given an assignment to tell the class what we wanted to be when we grew up. I stayed up all night and I really couldn’t picture myself as anything other then myself doing everything. 

The next day, I told the teacher I wanted to try everything, she told me, I should be an Actress because I could be a cop, or a fireman, or a princess. Anything. “Kacie you can be anything.” She gave me my first role in a school play that year and it changed my life. 

What do I want to be when I grow up? Me. 

I just want to be me. As a writer I control what I write. What I put into the world is mine and mine alone. Thats the best part of being a writer I think. Sure, you are met with criticism on a daily basis but who cares. You have to live with you. They don’t have anything to do with your life. 

Anything you do in this life, do with your whole heart. I just watched this great documentary last night on Warren Buffet. He was teaching a class and said something to the effect of, “If you are payed to do what you want to do, you would always be happy. You would jump out of bed each morning with joy.” 

That was what I got out of what he said. That is not a direct quote, but very close to. 

I sat in bed thinking, thats what I want. I want to be a payed writer and every day I want to get out of bed, spend an amazing day with my family, and when my daughter naps, and is asleep at night, I will write. I will write anything that I want to write. 

There is this amazing quote by J.M. Barrie,written for Peter Pan,

“Just think of happy thoughts and then you’ll fly.”

I want my daughter to grow up and be anything she wants to be. I want her to be happy.

I watch critics shred apart people every day. I just watched E’s Fashion Police for the Academy Awards. I watched them scorn at how Nicole Kidman was dressed. I was appalled. One of the most beautiful women, and they are just ripping her apart. 

You know? DON’T BE THAT PERSON. Let’s lift each other up. If we spent more time lifting other people up we could accomplish incredible things in this world. The more you tear people down, the more likely they will fall. 

I will leave you with this…

“There is freedom waiting for you,
On the breezes of the sky,
And you ask “What if I fall?”
Oh but my darling,
What if you fly?”
― Erin Hanson


Frankie's Malibu

Hi everyone! I’m so excited to tell you my first children Ebook is now available on both IBOOKS and at BLURB.COM . You can download to any device, IPAD, KINDLE, etc. 

for IBOOKS –

for BLURB-

-This is why I haven’t been able to get my Blog’s out as quickly as I’d like to this past month. 

As many of you know, our daughter Frankie was diagnosed with an extremely rare metabolic disease known as PKU. Her body doesn’t process protein. As a Mother and a writer, I searched for children’s book options for Metabolic Diseases and to my surprise there were slim to none. 

I was inspired to create something for these children, their families, and friends, that they could connect to. 

I want to inspire children like Frankie, to seek adventure in this amazing world, and to never let their personal struggles stand in their way…

View original post 87 more words


Hi everyone! I’m so excited to tell you my first children Ebook is now available on both IBOOKS and at BLURB.COM . You can download to any device, IPAD, KINDLE, etc. 

for IBOOKS –

for BLURB-

-This is why I haven’t been able to get my Blog’s out as quickly as I’d like to this past month. 

As many of you know, our daughter Frankie was diagnosed with an extremely rare metabolic disease known as PKU. Her body doesn’t process protein. As a Mother and a writer, I searched for children’s book options for Metabolic Diseases and to my surprise there were slim to none. 

I was inspired to create something for these children, their families, and friends, that they could connect to. 

I want to inspire children like Frankie, to seek adventure in this amazing world, and to never let their personal struggles stand in their way of living life to the fullest. 

These books are full of unique learning tools for young minds. Between learning to read, identifying wildlife, using their imagination, nutritional information, and travel. 

Thank you to all of you for your continued love and support. I hope you love this first book as much as we do, and continue to support education on metabolic diseases in our communities. That we can all have open minds and open hearts to families with special dietary requests. 




To sleep, or not to sleep? That is the Question. Answer: “Bitches Brew”

Wow, the lack of sleep is unreal. I know people warn you about it when you get pregnant. But man oh man, eleven months later, and… no, it hasn’t gotten better. Every night is a different story. 

So one of the reasons I haven’t been able to put blogs out faster is because I’ve just finished my first children’s book. I will reveal all at the end of week. It will be released first as an E-Book on amazon. I am absolutely thrilled about it. 

Lately though, Frankie has decided, if she is awake she needs me all of the time. No, I am not one of those parents that hovers over their child. Of course, I have her in my eye sight at all times, but I want her to be independent. But lately, she just wants Mommy to be next to her. Or if I’m editing on my computer, she is wrapped  around the bottom of my legs begging me to play. So I gave up on the idea of getting work done while she is in her playtime. 

So when she goes to bed, its adult time, where I pour myself a glass of wine. I do laundry, dishes, clean up, whatever, and then finally sit down and illustrate and write my children’s book. So I’m up  every night until midnight. 

So I am running on about five hours of sleep each day. No, it’s not healthy. Yes, this is the reality. My husband works crazy hours so he is little to no help on the sleep issue.

So Coffee, has become my best friend.”Bitches Brew” to be specific. 

Glass of wine at night, and a cup of Bitches Brew in the morning and I am good to go. Sort of. No, I am not making up the name. Thats what the coffee is called. The brand is called Groundwork. Go get some. It’s delicious, and the slap in the face you need in the morning. 

So yes, this blog isn’t supposed to be inspiring. It’s supposed to be a hug. I’m letting you know you aren’t the only tired person out in the world, trying to make it through their day, with a little bit of sanity. You are loved.

I’m giving you a hug and thoughtfully reminding you, I know. I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. 

And trust me, “Bitches Brew” will get you through. Or at least help a little.  

Much Love. 

It’s a Small Big World

What a privilege it is to live in this incredible world. Sure there is a lot of crap that goes on but if you open your eyes to the world around us and the life we’ve been given. You might walk a little differently. A little perspective goes along way.

When our daughter was diagnosed with PKU we were terrified. No one understood what it felt like. We were walking this unknown path with a four day old baby. Everyone we reached out to had never heard of PKU. We were lost in a great big world.

We listened to our doctors, followed referrals and found ourselves at Children’s Hospital LA. I am not going to speak for that hospital in terms of other departments. I know they save families lives and do extraordinary things. But the Metabolic Department is practically nonexistent. I won’t go into the gritty details but we quickly transferred to UCLA and our quality of life was dramatically changed.

In the beginning all of our doctors were pushing us to join parent groups on places like Facebook, or meet up with other parents who have children with PKU. We simply weren’t ready. We felt pressured to open our house to strangers when all we wanted was to be able to find our own rhythm, and surround ourselves with family and friends.

Well here we are almost eleven months later. PKU is an extremely rare metabolic disease. I lean on God. I pray every day. Lately my prayer has been to bring a friend into my life that understands. I don’t know if you believe in God or not, but I will tell you this, if you do start believing, you won’t be so scared, and you won’t be lonely.

Well, I joined a couple groups on Facebook. Amazing communities of people. The world became a bit smaller for me. I could sympathize so much with those families. But here we are in Malibu and most of the families are spread out across the world.

Two months ago I was at my chiropractor and the front desk girl says to me, you won’t believe this, but another Mom who comes to see us has a daughter with PKU. My jaw dropped. I said, well maybe someday we will meet!

I left with this optimism thinking, there is another Mom like me that lives in my area who has a daughter with PKU?! And nerves crept in thinking. Oh no, I can’t force this to happen. She will think I’m weird for it. So I just put it in my prayers and said, I would really like to meet her if you can make that happen.

Well, two weeks ago I’m rushing out of my chiropractors office to get my doctor to her pediatrician. I’m checking out, and the receptionist says to me, “Kacie, this is _____,  this is the Mom I was telling you about.

I introduced myself right away. Frankie was in my arms, and pretty fussy because she wasn’t feeling well. We hit it off right away. I had an invitation to my daughters birthday with me that I handed to her and told her I would love to get coffee. Turns out her daughter is less than a month younger than Frankie. What are the chances?!!!!! Two girls day’s apart diagnosed with the same life long journey, and we live incredibly close to each other. Believe what you want to believe but PRAYERS WORK.

Tears built in her eyes as we spoke about our journey and I thought, wow, this woman knows. She knows this feeling of loneliness wondering our way through this crazy journey. Well, we’ve been texting and talking ever since. We are getting together today, and I just wanted to write this for anyone reading to let you know, you are NEVER ALONE.

I don’t know if you believe in God, but PRAYERS WORK. I mean it. If you struggle with loneliness, get out, meet people, explore. When you put what you want into the universe, it will happen for you. But you can’t sit at home and twiddle your thumbs and wait for the phone to ring. You have to get out and live. Put that stamp on the envelope and mail that letter! Apply to life. Buy that plane ticket. Ask that girl you always think about out to coffee. It’s just a coffee!!!!!! But maybe that coffee could change your quality of life forever.

You are stronger than you know! And I will say this one more time, YOU ARE NEVER ALONE.

Much love, and off I go to meet another Mother and her daughter that could possibly be a wonderful, life long,  friendship.

Cotton Candy Sunday

Frankie’s Birthday is coming up and her party is going to be the theme of COTTON CANDY. It is PKU friendly! Our cotton candy machine that I ordered arrived on Saturday. It’s been raining like crazy here in Malibu so we’ve all been stuck inside most days.

Yesterday Frankie and I sat on the couch and watched the rain falling outside. She loved it. She would put her hand against the glass and try to catch the rain as it dripped down the outside glass. It was adorable. 

So much excitement and curiosity about the world outside. If we each practiced as much enthusiasm about the world around us I think we would all be happy and counting our blessings on a daily basis. Have you stopped and looked up at a tree lately. I mean really? Stop for a moment when you are outside next and just stare at a tree. Yes, you might look a little silly, but the more you look the more amazing it is. I mean it started from a tiny seed? 

Anyway, this past year I am thankful. Every day is an exciting challenge met with endless smiles from this little kiddo. Well, if you’ve been watching the news, our area has been kind of a mess from mud slides and roads closing from boulders. So we are stuck here for a little while. Although, while I write this, the rain has cleared and the sun is shining again! 

So last night during the wild rain, we decided to try out our new cotton candy machine. We ordered candy floss online, Pink Vanilla (CLASSIC), Strawberry, and Blue Raspberry. We made Pink Vanilla last night and found ourselves, eating COTTON CANDY in the rain on a Sunday night. 

We gave Frankie a little try. Her first time eating cotton candy. Honestly, it was amazing. Her whole face lit up from so much excitement and joy! Heaven was smiling down at our kitchen last night. 

I look back at the first year with Frankie and all the challenges we’ve been met with than I think, we were eating cotton candy last night at home, with our daughter. How amazing is that?! I have Faith that our life will be filled with more cotton candy moments with our daughter. 

I can’t wait for her party. Cotton candy for everyone! I hope everyone finds as much joy that day as we share every day with our Frankie. 



Let them eat cake…

Frankie’s birthday is coming up in March. It will be her first birthday. The “First Birthday Party” is certainly a huge milestone. I’m sure most parents can relate, but for Mike and I it’s a huge celebration for us making it through our child’s first year. I mean, wow. One year of raising our first child! That was crazy, amazing, and exhausting.

With Frankie’s diagnosis of Pku we have learned so much about ourselves as Parents and our Daughters unbelievable bravery and amazing spirit. I can’t even count how many blood tests, along with doctors appointments, and other testing.  But through it all she has the most unbreakable spirit.

She carries herself with a smile and curiosity about the world that is just so beautiful. She might be only turning one but I feel like I’ve known her all my life.

So the FIRST BIRTHDAY PARTY! Frankie is eating solid food now but obviously not adult food yet. She is a Vegan, but she can’t eat nuts, most legumes, Aspartame, or grains. Anything high in protein is out. Her body allows 6 grams of protein a day with KUVAN.

Kuvan is her medication that she takes that allows her body to process more protein. About thirty percent more protein than she would be able to eat if she wasn’t on Kuvan. Which sound’s crazy to you maybe, but for us 6 grams of protein is a huge number compared to 3-4 when arranging her daily meals.

Look at it this way, my daughter can eat “ONE EGG” that would be her daily allowance of protein. But she will never eat eggs. She will be on an extremely low protein diet all her life so eggs, are not options right now.

But what do you do? As her parent I am her advocate for her health, and we want to educate our friends on her diet. But since it’s her first birthday she won’t really be eating much of the food other than a small amount of what I have prepared for her in advance.

So out of respect for our daughter, we will serve both Vegetarian and Vegan options this year only. This is her day. So in the future she will be able to eat absolutely anything and everything at her parties. This year however we will bring a mix of food but no Meat.

Then came the decision on what to do for her dessert. Dear Lord Help Me… Cake? Do you have any idea how much protein is in cake? I’ve dreamed of the moment that she get’s to bury her face in cake and frosting. Growing up when I would attend my nieces and nephews first birthday that was always such a great moment. Would this moment be taken away from us? That’s fine if it is. Whatever is best for our daughter.

Guess what! We will have cake! WE will let them eat cake! cakes

I double checked with our Nutritionist and all is great!!!!! Protein Free! And there is Icing with No protein! She will have a gorgeous first birthday cake! The substitute for eggs in the recipe will be to use applesauce instead, and you are good to go!

We decided the theme of Frankie’s First Birthday Party, “Cotton Candy!” Also Pku Friendly! Just sugar after all.

As a Mom I want what’s best for our child. I understand she will never have a “Normal Life” because  she will have an “Extraordinary life!” We will do everything in our power that we make every day special for her. And this first birthday is going to be a celebration of her life.

Now to plan the rest of the party. Has anyone noticed how outrageous the price of balloons have become?!

The Vanishing Friend Trend

The thing you fear. No, not my friends. They will know I’m a cool Mom right? They won’t disappear. The truth is your REAL friends will stick around. Maybe not in the same way. But they will be there for you. 

When you are pregnant, your friends are there for you for anything. Your baby shower?! Amazing. We had an awesome time. We had a co-ed adult only party with about forty of our friends. It was fantastic. 

When your baby is born. It’s a whole new Adult world. A world were your old life, and your social circle is abruptly changed. For many reasons, one, some friends aren’t “baby people”At least that’s the excuse you hear. Reason two, “too busy”. Reasons three, “they aren’t your friends”

I’m not trying to sound negative. But it’s the truth. So Mike and I have no family here. All of Mike’s family is back in Chicago area. My family is in Washington State. My Mother died of Cancer in 2011. Thank God for two women in our life that live in California. They sacrificed so much from their family to be here with us when we needed help. And thank God for our Family. They helped out in any way they could from a long distance. 

Frankie was diagnosed of PKU on day four at the hospital when we were packing to leave. Our whole world was turned upside down. From this excitement of going home with this brand new gorgeous child, to a brand new gorgeous child with a disease which we had no clarity on what to do. 

When we got home we were zombies. We were of course consistently smiling and loving toward our child, but when she slept we cried and couldn’t tie our own shoelaces, let alone make dinner. 

We emailed our circle of friends, which included family, and our bridesmaid’s and groomsmen which we consider our closer friends. Let’s just say, when bad things happen in life, God makes it very clear to you who your true friends are. 

It was like a cleansing process for us. This past year has been an eye-opening experience for us. But honestly, I think it’s a blessing. I have experienced this phenomenon twice in my life. When my Mom battled cancer for four years, I watched people that had been close to her, her whole life drop out of her life like flies. “Too busy,” to hold her hand or call. “Too busy, TO CALL.”

 When her funeral came it was unbelievable the amount of people that showed up. And I sat there looking around at all these people in tears and thought, where were you? Where were you when she needed you? But you can’t get angry, you have to forgive and just let it go. My Mom was the most kind, loving, person you ever met in your life. She never said a harsh word to another person. 

She drove an H2 Hummer in Washington. Main reason, because it’s the safest car to drive and she had four grand-babies at the time and wanted them as safe as possible. Once we were on the freeway and this person drove by us and flipped her off. Believe it or not, it happened a lot. I was shocked and said angrily to my Mom, “Oh my Gosh Mom, that guy just flipped you off!”

Her response, “Oh sweetie, he was probably just having a bad day. We should pray for him.” 

This was her. She always saw the best in people. 

The second time I witnessed this “friend’s disappearing phenomenon” was after she was gone in my Father’s life. Friends, dropped like flies. My Dad told me that when you die, if you can count five true friends on your hand you’ve lived a successful and fulfilling life. 

I think it’s true. Look at your hand and count the people that if you called right now and said I need you, they would drop everything and come to be by your side. If you can? You are a very blessed individual.

When Frankie was diagnosed, that first month, we could count the amount of people that showed up for us on one hand. And you know what? Those are the same people today that check in, support us, and love on us. 

I think the point of writing this is, don’t get discouraged. You will go through sort of a mourning process. But take it as a blessing. You not only find out who your friends are, but you find out who YOU ARE. How strong you are! And you are always stronger than your think. God NEVER gives you something that you can’t handle. Your child is amazing! You are amazing. And you can get through anything. 

Perhaps you might be reading this and your friend just had a baby. My advice to you is find a day that you are free, call them, visit them, bring food, bring some flowers. Ask what diaper size their child is in and bring them a pack. Being a parent is overwhelming. It takes extraordinary sacrifice. Any type of encouragement goes farther than you can ever imagine. 

I suppose what I’m trying to say is, Challenge yourself to be a friend to someone who needs it more than you will ever know.